Self-Creation and the Art of Modeling

Posted On August 20, 2019 / Written by Dr. Linda Gadbois

One of the most fundamental ways we can develop certain qualities and ways of being in ourselves is by modeling others who actively demonstrate those qualities. We all know this as children where it comes naturally by pretending to be like our favorite characters and heroes, and as teenagers when we’re taking over the process of creating our identity by trying on new ways of being in order to see how they feel. As we grow older and get caught up in the hustle and bustle of our adult life, we start becoming fixed as a certain way of being and seem to somehow lose touch with knowing how to create ourselves. We can train our body to take on any characteristic we want to by practicing being that way in a diligent and consistent manner. We can train ourselves to be anyway we want to be by first deciding how we want to be, then practicing being that way over and over until it becomes natural.

Creating a Model for Transforming Ourselves

In order to begin creating ourselves in a deliberate manner we have to first form an idea in our mind of how we want to be. We have to look at what qualities and traits we don’t like in ourselves, and decide which ones we’re going to use in order to transform them. What kind of character traits do we want to possess and how we want to be as a person. Once we decide on the characteristic we want to acquire, we then find someone who naturally possesses that characteristic, and we study them to see how it is they do it. We notice all the little mannerisms in how they perform it. We then practice doing it the same way over and over until it starts becoming natural.

Anytime that we’re practicing being different than we normally are, it feels awkward at first. This is natural and will go away with continued practice. It can help to practice in front of a mirror so you can see what you look like and make sure you’re doing it the way you like. This is the same method used by dancers and actors who practice while watching themselves in a mirror to make sure their form is correct. As you watch yourself you can make any adjustments you like until you get it just the way you want it. Once you’re able to do it proficiently, practice it numerous times until you can do it without thought, discipline, or effort. You have to build it into your muscle as body memory.

The Magical Number of Manifestation

There’s what we can think of as a magic number for any type of manifestation or making something into a habit, and that number is 40. If you repeat something 40 times, you build a somatic memory of it, and you begin doing it naturally without having to think about it or make an effort. If you practice a new ritual or routine for 40 days (approx. 6 weeks) it becomes a new habit and you do it automatically without having to remember to do it. This is why all programs or processes designed to produce change or transformation of some kind are conducted in 6 week time frames. Other programs that run for ’21 days’ are just over the halfway mark, and become easier to maintain at the hallway point without a lot of effort. The law of the Tetrad, represented by the number 4, represents material manifestation (4 elements) as our mental and physical constitution, and provides us with the means as a process by which we can actively transform our constitution.  

Start by deciding what it is about you that you want to change, and what it is you want to change it to. Once you decide how you want to be, find a person you know or can watch who has that trait or way about them, and mentor them. Study their mannerisms and how it is exactly that they do it, and then imitate them in your own way. Practice being the same way over and over, until you begin doing it just the way you want. Once you have it down, practice it numerous more times until you can do it without any effort. Then set the intention to practice it throughout the day for several days until it starts coming naturally and you no longer have to try or remind yourself to do it.

Synchronizing your Mind with your Body

What you’ll notice is that just by changing your posture and how you’re being and acting, changes how you sense yourself and how you feel as a result. It’ll literally change your perspective as your perception to match it. Your physiology is always equated to your state of mind, and as you change what you’re doing with our body it changes how you feel about yourself. As you begin sensing yourself in a new and different way, it changes how you feel and how you experience yourself. As your experience of yourself changes, so does your experience of everything else. As you perceive yourself in new ways, the world around you begins changing in the same way. You influence others by stimulating those same qualities in them, changing the nature of your interaction.

All experience of the outer world is a direct reflection of how we experience ourselves inwardly. As we change our outward actions, our inward state changes forming a new perspective and way of seeing the outer world through a new perceptual lens. For example, by simply correcting your posture and standing up straight with your shoulders back, neck straight and head centered directly over your pelvic area (center of balance) with your chin up, you automatically feel more confident and naturally assert yourself more. Learning to utilize our body posture as a means of self-expression is one of the ways we can act on ourselves to change the way we feel about ourselves. Disciplined action only comes by way of an equally disciplined mind. We use our mind to intentionally direct our body as a means of creating ourselves to be a certain way.

Modeling is the number one way we intentionally develop ourselves to possess the character traits and style of self-expression that we desire. This process can be done to acquire (bring out and cultivate) or transform any physical characteristic (habit), including voice tone and quality, how you naturally breathe, and how you walk and hold yourself. Don’t ever make the mistake of taking the attitude that you’re somehow copying others, because this isn’t the case. As you practice a particular form it allows your own style to emerge where you can consciously begin developing it just like any art. It creates a pathway through which you can actively bring out latent potential and use it to cultivate yourself to greater levels of self-expression. Don’t take on too much at one time, and become completely intuitive with one thing before you move on to another.

Dr. Linda Gadbois

Coaching for professional development and self-mastery