Realizing your True Higher Purpose

       There are very few things that give our life more meaning and provide us with natural motivation as a kind of passion and devotion than realizing what our true purpose in life is. While we may have several purposes in the general sense of life responsibilities that are born out of love and devotion of some kind, we all possess what we can think of as our main purpose that involves what we have come here as a soul to learn, bring into higher forms of expression, and use to grow ourselves in some way. Our soul’s purpose is recognized as an all-prevalent idea that comes completely natural to us and is what acts to sustain us through our darkest and most fear-driven moments, as well as what brings us a true sense of fulfillment and contentment in the accomplishment of overcoming life challenges and expressing ourselves in terms of our gifts and talents.

       Our soul’s purpose as the main theme that serves to shape our life as a whole forms the basis for other purposes we form that help us navigate stages of our life or that are set as phases of personal growth that are met and undertaken in a fully conscious and willful manner. The fulfillment of our purpose comes only through realization and making decisions in the most important moments to really apply ourselves to the best of our ability and even beyond what we thought we were capable of. It also becomes apparent to us through the administration of what we call “karma” (unconscious use of will to create) and the necessary path as a process of transformation for redeeming ourselves from what was set into motion as a cause and effect relationship through our own perceptions and actions.

The Nature of our Soul and Mind

       What we commonly tend to think of as our soul, is threefold in nature just like our mind is, because they’re ultimately the same thing, and function in identical ways through the same principles on different levels or planes of existence that form a hierarchical structure based on vibratory frequency that move from a higher vibration to a lower one in the manifestation of the same thing (idea). In a similar manner, each level of our soul exists at a different level of consciousness with a different kind of purpose and reason, which are all correlated in a way that can be played out together in a harmonious fashion.

       What we refer to as the “lower soul” is directly associated with our bodily existence as a higher animal-like being and is the offspring (produced and maintained by) of our higher, human and immortal Soul. The main purpose of our lower soul is survival, self-protection, and propagation of the species. It’s primarily unconscious in nature, instinctively driven through emotional states, and lacks any real awareness of its higher, immortal existence. The purpose of our lower soul usually involves family, children and loved ones, and providing for them while keeping them healthy and safe. The means for doing this usually involves our profession and how we make a living and the lifestyle we create through purely material and natural means.

       Our higher or “medium” soul is a part of the human kingdom, which exists on the plane directly above the animal kingdom of the lower soul, and is both mortal (physical) and immortal (energetic) in nature. Our human soul acts as a medium between our Over Soul and is what forms the bridge as a step-down process between higher and lower worlds. The primary purpose of our higher soul is to redeem itself from patterns created while in the unconscious state of the lower soul, and fashion itself instead to be of the same nature as the Super Soul. The main function of our higher soul is transmutation through the conscious act of self-creation. We are created initially through our formative conditioning while in a purely unconscious state. Our higher soul takes over the process of creating itself by becoming self-aware and using its higher capacities of the mind to impregnate the subconscious of the lower soul with ideas that it then acts to produce as a reality that provides the higher soul with an “experience of itself”.

       The higher, human soul is the creative aspect of us that witnesses and forms realization of itself around the realities it acts to indirectly create. It shapes itself through the decisions it makes by always asking itself “who am I”, and then producing the reality of that decision that provides it with experiences of itself. Through various acts of self-realization it makes decisions that it then directs the body to act out as the means of creating itself in an intentional and fully aware manner. This is the aspect of us that creates itself through association and how it identifies with its own self-produced experiences. Its purpose always involves transforming itself to higher and more virtuous states of being that operates through more of a universal identity rather than a personal one. As it transforms itself through constant self-expression of selected attributes and qualities, it simultaneously seeds the collective unconscious of the animal-soul providing the pathway as a vibratory frequency or mental state that becomes available for all those seeking a similar path.

       The higher soul resides fully within the astral plane of Light which is constructed out of multiple planes of higher and lower regions as specialized rates and modes of vibration. The lower regions of the astral plane are instinctual and emotionally driven, and the higher regions are intelligent and willfully driven. It acts to marry thought as an archetypal idea to the feeling sensations and emotions of a complementary nature (the thought naturally gives rise to corresponding sensations and emotions) in order to manifest the idea as a reality of the same nature. For this reason its purpose always involves growth as transformation that dissolves karma as unconscious creation and creates itself in a fully conscious manner through use of its higher capacities of self-realization, free choice, and will.

       The Super Soul or Over Soul exists in an “unformed state of pure potential” as a unified field of infinite possibilities. Its only purpose is to provide the substance and means for the human soul to use in order to create itself and always “works”, so to speak, for the benefit of all involved in a universal manner. It’s not “personal or individual” in nature, but is what forms all individuals and personal realities. It contains all of the archetypes as “whole ideas” (ideals) that are willfully drawn down into the Astral plane by the higher soul and formed (transformed) into personalized versions of the same idea through a continuous process of adaptation and modification. This is where we obtain substance as universal archetypes that we use to fashion our human nature as “mass consciousness”.

       Just as instinct governs the lower soul, archetypes as gods and goddesses that make up the Zodiac and Mythology govern the higher planes of creativity. This plane provides the human soul with what it needs in order to self-create in a deliberate and precise manner by choosing, embodying, and becoming certain qualities that form characteristics. All higher, human souls are comprised of certain combinations of the same universal archetypes in different degrees and potency. Its purpose is always universal in nature and involves serving mankind and the entire natural world in the most beneficial way possible based on how they use their own powers to self-create. When in our highest purpose as universal beings we realize we are the “caretakers” of Nature (and our body-soul) and live in harmony with all of life which originates from the same ultimate source.

       Naturally, these three aspects of the same Soul share a common purpose that moves the same idea from a universal and unified state down into an individual and personal expression as our purpose for transforming ourselves. Our soul’s purpose in the ultimate sense is formed by a metaphorical idea that’s played out simultaneously on all three levels in a congruent and harmonious way where one forms the foundation for the next to spontaneously emerge out of it. The purpose of the lower soul sets the stage necessary for the higher soul to gain self-realization and actively shape itself by utilizing the archetypes, qualities, and characteristics of the Supernal plane. Our lower soul forms what we call our “personality” (natural to all animals), which is developed through our childhood, whereas our higher soul forms our “identity”. Our identity is something that we create while in an adolescent and mature state.

       While the purpose of our lower soul comes in an automatic fashion through instinct to survive, reproduce, and raise and protect our family, or achieve material success of some kind, our human soul’s purpose involves using its higher capacities in a skillful manner in order to create from a self-aware and intentional state. As humans, our ultimate purpose is to develop ourselves to a higher state by “becoming one with God” (embodying archetypal ideals), and form ourselves to be divine and self-determined as a sovereign being. Our personality lays the foundation out of which we can deliberately create “who we are” as an individual through use of our higher, creative capacities in a congruent and harmonious way.

       Our main purpose as a human soul is to wake-up in the unconscious state of our lower nature and realize that it only acts as a vehicle and means for us to create ourselves, not the other way around. Most people live their entire life being determined by others and their life conditions and circumstances, and are shaped almost exclusively in relationship and response to others while unaware of their true identity and creative abilities. As long as we have practical responsibilities as the fulfillment of our lower soul’s purpose, it can prevent us from making the true decisions about who we are and how we’re going to be because of what it would mean if we did and how it would affect everyone else. This is why our spiritual path usually isn’t taken up fully until our kids are grown and on their own, and we no longer have the responsibility to care for loved ones. It’s only at this point in our life that we can make decisions for ourselves that don’t violate the free will of everyone else involved.

       This change in purpose from our lower one to our higher one, often comes through what’s called a “mid-life crisis”, or where what we built our identity around our whole life through a role we played in a certain dynamic, suddenly ends or changes, and we find ourselves feeling lost and without a purpose anymore. We no longer know who we are or what it is we’re meant to do. This is one of the most natural forms of transformation that we go through as the fulfillment of one purpose, freeing us to take up another purpose of a higher nature that involves our individuality as a soul, and consciously exercising our ability to create in a concentrated fashion, instead of as part of a group mind.

       At this point we begin asking ourselves who we really are when not being defined by our relationships and life situation. We begin stepping into a more universal role and make decisions in terms of what it is we want to contribute to life before we die. We move from shaping ourselves based on others to shaping ourselves based on our own ideas about our self. We begin looking at our own issues and habits with new eyes and addressing our own unconscious tendencies in order to transform them into a fully conscious awareness where our actions become deliberate and well-thought out and nothing acts to bind or limit us. We move from being almost exclusively focused on others to going within and focusing on our own nature and developing ourselves by way of our own hand.

Our Soul’s Design

       As a human, immortal, and creative being, we are born into this world with everything we need to fulfill our ultimate purpose. We’re all designed as a specialized pattern of natural desires, interests, gifts, talents, special abilities, attitudes, disposition, and temperament that provides us with the tools and means necessary for doing what we came here to do. Our higher soul’s purpose comes natural to us and requires us to actively utilize our full potential in order to achieve it while also moving through whatever is acting to prevent or counteract it. Our lower soul’s purpose, which is materially based, sets the stage that’s ideal for doing this. Our true purpose always requires us to move through our fears, character flaws, and false beliefs in order to actualize latent qualities necessary in order to create in new ways by transforming them.

       Our higher soul’s purpose can’t be fulfilled while we’re still nurturing and protecting our weakness and fears formed through our formative (unconscious) conditioning. Fear must be transformed by choosing to employ courage in its place, allowing us to move ahead in spite of our fears, and dissolve them as a result. Fear, like all emotions, when brought into our thoughts is an illusion whose only purpose is to stop and prevent us from doing something we want and need to do. Our natural weaknesses and shortcomings are what act to prevent and counteract our soul’s true purpose and we have to actively employ and exercise our higher capacities of realization, reason, choice and will in order to turn them into strengths as creative tools. We transform them through awareness and the practical application of universal laws that provide us with the processes necessary for transformation.

       Our immortal soul’s purpose is to ultimately redeem itself from a prison of its own making produced out of past errors in perceiving and by facilitating its own process of growth and transformation. It requires us to step into our true identity as creative, conscious beings and shape ourselves by way of our own mind. This is a manifestation not built with the hands or by way of others, but by the soul that’s acting to direct the activities of the body and material world. This purpose and the process it presupposes are intimate and highly personal in nature and don’t ever require other people to accomplish. Its purpose is to become autonomous as a sovereign being that’s not being controlled and determined by others or the natural forces of the material world.

        The process of personal growth involves transforming vices into virtues in order to become more “god-like”. It seeks to transform itself through the vision it creates of itself that acts to heal the trauma and conditioning incurred by the lower soul by witnessing it from a higher, detached awareness. The awareness as self-realization is what acts as the means of transformation because it brings what’s operating in your life just below the level of awareness into the light where you can see it in a clear and more accurate way. Through awareness alone, which alters our perception, it loses its grip and we’re no longer caught up in the illusion of it. As you become aware of the false nature of it, you realize simultaneously that you actually have a choice as to “who you’re going to be and what reality you’re going to create” instead.

       The ultimate purpose of your higher soul is to step fully into the awareness of your ability to create from a fully self-aware state, and make new, intentional decisions that you then act out in a deliberate way as the true means of creating. We can only break patterns of the past that we were continuing to faithfully act out without direct awareness by forming an objective and non-personal awareness around them. By becoming aware of what previously eluded us, we step into a true position of actually being able to create in new and more beneficial ways. Once we’re able to clearly see an illusion that we played an active part in, we continue to see it any time it’s being played out around us and we recognize when we’re being triggered somehow in order to continue acting it out.

Higher Forms of Self-Awareness

       Our true purpose in life is to wake-up in the dream we’ve mistaken for being real and realize that it’s actually something we’re doing to ourselves. While in our higher nature as a sovereign soul we realize that nothing is ever being “done to us by another” in terms of how we experience things, and that we’re always the ones creating ourselves in relationship and response to others. Once we become aware of this and recognize how it is that we’re doing this, we can begin creating our experiences and ourselves by way of those experiences in a truly responsible manner, and act “on ourselves” (our lower nature) to redeem ourselves from past karma by making new decisions formed by our higher self from higher states of self-awareness. By making new decisions in the midst of what used to be automated patterns, we can replace them (transform them) with new patterns that are a product of our true identity and more accurately demonstrate our ability to create ourselves from a fully self-aware state.

       Our higher soul’s true purpose is to heal itself of past errors born out of an unconscious conditioned state by utilizing our power of self-awareness and realization, our ability to make new decisions for our self and our life, and employ willpower to act them out. By achieving a state of true self-awareness it automatically breaks the patterns that bound us to lower consciousness where we created in a predominately unconscious, emotionally driven manner, shaped by the group mind and the emotional states and behavioral dynamics we were trained to by others.

       Once we realize how we’ve been creating our experiences out of a conditioned mindset and automatic behaviors, their hold on us begins dissolving and we can see them clearly as the illusions they are from that moment forward. Once we’re in a position of creating in an aware and intentional manner, and we’ve acted to transform our weakness and character flaws into strengths, and dissolved the unconscious patterns that bound us to a life of delusion, our true purpose can be realized and fulfilled. We gain a true realization that the lower soul of the body is merely a vehicle and instrument for the higher soul to express and self-create rather than what acts to create and determine our higher soul.

Summary

       The lower soul of the body is what forms our “personality” as a member of the animal kingdom through genetics and formative conditioning. This part of us only “knows” what it’s taught and lacks the ability to create by “thinking for itself” (inventing in an original way). The higher soul of the human kingdom is the “I” in the equation and its purpose involves creating its own identity as an individual. When we remain in a primarily unconscious state, our identity comes as the offspring and natural evolution of our personality and is formed by whatever situation we find ourselves in and what roles we naturally take on and play as a result. In order to employ our higher consciousness and ability to be self-determined, we have to realize who we are in terms of how we’ve been created by others up to this point, and accurately identify what it is about ourselves that we need to transform in order to take over our own creation from a fully self-aware state. We do this by actively employing the archetypes and qualities of the Supernal plane, and by transforming vices as weakness and addictions into virtues as strengths that are of a higher morality and immortal in nature. The Higher soul isn’t concerned with material possessions and accomplishments, but only of “who we become” by way of our material body, possessions and creations. It’s only our identity as our self-created individuality that transcends the material plane at the death of the body.

 Dr. Linda Gadbois

Soul Essence, Life Purpose, and Destiny

multiple selves While many people struggle around the idea of what their life purpose is, or what it is they’re meant to do, this can be very easily understood if we look at the Law that governs all of life. Every single living being results from a “seed”. The seed contains all the information necessary for creating the “being” that will grow and develop out of it.  Just as our physical DNA provides the information for constructing our body with certain inherent characteristics that also result in our personality, our spiritual DNA provides all the attributes, qualities, characteristics, and tendencies that provide the basis from what emerges out of our personality as our identity. Our identity comes from what we associate with and have a natural connection to. Just as we have a predisposition for certain physical maladies, we also have a predisposition (pre-destiny) for certain mental and expressive activities. We all have certain things we’re naturally attracted to, interested in, always pursuing and engaging in, and feel a distinct connection to. Law basically states that all function or behavior stems from the internal design of something. The outer is the direct reflection of the inner, and vice versa. Whatever someone is meant to do and become, they’re perfectly designed to do so. We have everything we need “within us” as either active or latent potential in order to self-actualize. Who we become is based on how we’re designed. How we perform and what type of function and behaviors we naturally employ comes as a result of our innate qualities and natural abilities. We’re not only prone to and enthusiastically engage in certain type of activities, but we also take a distinct and unique attitude and approach towards them. We are also imbued with an individual style and mindset that we bring to everything we do, much like our fingerprint which acts as our signature for creative work. So what you’re “meant to do”, you do naturally, without the need for prompting or instructing. There’s nothing that you need to “acquire” from an outside source in order to be able to do it. You simply need to consciously recognize and awaken qualities and attributes as inherent potential which, up to this point, have been predominately dormant within you. This is done primarily in two ways; you either place yourself, or find yourself in a situation where you need to access, utilize and develop them in order to function or accomplish something, or you intentionally engage in activities and situations that will allow you to exercise and effectively utilize these untapped resources. last goodbye We are all born with what we call talents, gifts, special abilities, aptitudes, and interests that are essential components in fulfilling our soul’s destiny through a life purpose or mission of some sort. This is why we have them, we’re meant to use them. What we’re meant to do is what we love to do and do naturally. We’re always in the process of doing it in some way through our natural way of being. We automatically engage in the activities associated with our life purpose. Our life purpose isn’t about the physical accomplishment that’s involved or what we manifest in the material sense by way of our activities, but rather who we become by way of these activities. What aspects of ourselves we develop because of these activities. The physical body is only a vehicle for the soul which exists as “qualities of consciousness” that express in distinct ways consistently producing certain types of reality. So the reality itself and the activities that go into it, are not what’s important in the ultimate sense. They simply provide the means and pathways to “becoming” by developing your soul’s character and identity. Your soul exists as a vibratory state based on the qualities of consciousness you actively employ and bring into full expression, developing them into your natural way of being The only meaning of the physical manifestation that results from your soul’s expression is that it provided the pathway through which you were able to exercise certain abilities turning them into “experiences of yourself” that become memory. Just as our physical body is built and regenerated out of information as memory that provides a kind of blueprint for organizing and structuring matter so that it functions in certain ways, your soul is comprised of memory it obtains from creating life experiences “of” itself as something specific, that shapes how it’s being and what type of realities it acts to naturally create through their fundamental perception and style of interpretation. How we’re “being” determines “how” we do whatever it is we’re doing. Our being is our style in doing. What we have memory of as repetition, we can repeat in a spontaneous and automatic fashion. It comes natural to us. So if the soul engages in building a house, it’s not the house as the manifestation of its activity that’s important, but rather the “experience” one acquires from actually going through the process of doing it. What one goes through and what parts of themselves they need to utilize in order to do it, which acts to develop those abilities as permanent skills. Once abilities and talents are acquired through practice, they become a permanent part of us, whereas the house itself is only temporary, and subject to being bought, lost, taken away, or destroyed by outside, uncontrollable forces of some sort. pentad door Just as we have natural loves and aspirations towards certain things, ideas, and people, we also have natural fears, inhibitions, and a foreboding feeling around other things. These “negative” feelings that are of a pronounced nature, are designed to stop or prevent us from doing something. They act as road blocks that are usually directly associated with our loves and special abilities, which we have to encounter and resolve in order to actualize our higher potential. These are seen as “challenges” on the path that we have to willingly step into in order to continue on our path. Fear and love are always directly associated to each other. All of our fears are “around” or because of what we love. A fear is considered a limitation because it prevents us from utilizing some aspect ourselves necessary to overcome it. The soul’s only purpose in life is to grow by way of its ability to freely self-express creating “experiences of itself” as courageous, powerful, strong, competent, profound, and able to overcome all odds in the pursuit of virtue. So our life purpose requires us to encounter our fears and overcome them utilizing new parts of ourselves that have remain latent up to that point. We only learn and grow through challenges. The soul’s only mission in life is to grow and evolve itself to become more and more capable and free. So when trying to gain awareness around what your soul’s purpose is in this lifetime, ask yourself, what is it that I’m perfectly designed to do? What is it that I do naturally and am always engaged in doing in some fashion? What are my talents, inner gifts, special abilities and aptitudes, and character traits? What is it that I feel a connection to, resonate with, and have an immediate interest in? What is it that always calls to me? What is it that I want to do, but I’m afraid to do it? What are some of my greatest fears in life, and what do they seem to be associated with? What is it that prevents me from doing what I really want to do? What parts of myself do I want to have more of? Self-reflection and asking yourself basic questions as a way of gaining clarity around areas that are vague and cloudy at best, will help you begin formulating a distinct idea around what your soul’s purpose is in this life, and what it is you need to dedicate yourself to expressing in as full a manner as possible, knowing that it will facilitate your growth and is the way to work “on yourself” to create yourself. Dr. Linda Gadbois  

The Struggle to find Meaning and Purpose

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As we go through life, we’re always building our life around what gives us a sense of purpose. This usually comes through a relationship of some form, either in the romantic sense, where we build a life together, or when we have children and a family that we love and who counts on us for their well-being and happiness. It can also come from work of some sort that we feel passionate about and that helps others, enriches people’s lives, or somehow makes the world a better place. It can also come from creative work, whether it be art or music of some form, writing, making a beautiful home, cultivating a garden, cooking for our family, or taking care of someone to help them heal and grow. It often comes from being needed, having someone depending on us, or the pleasure and joy that comes from providing and giving to others in need. Whatever it is that gives you a sense of “building your life around” it. Whatever gives you a sense of direction and infuses your life with a deep sense of meaning, where everyday you know what you’re waking up for and what you need to do.
When we find ourselves alone in life, either after raising a family that’s grown up and gone, ending long-term relationships, suffering an illness, disease or disability, we come face to face with the reality of what gives our life meaning, and what serves to motivate us in the most ordinary sense. When we have no purpose, nothing to build our life around, it can leave us feeling empty, drained, unmotivated, and depressed. Things we once enjoyed no longer appeal to us because doing them alone isn’t the same as doing them with a loved one where you share the experience and feel the happiness that comes from giving and connecting, or the companionship of always having family of some sort, whether actual or good friends.
When our roles change in life, and what we once built our identity around falls away or ends somehow, and we no longer know who we are or what we’re meant to do, life becomes meaningless and our purpose muddied and unclear. To work and build something only for yourself, often brings no real sense of pleasure or fulfillment. Being alone and working only for yourself, can bring a deep sense of loneliness that goes way beyond longing to be with somebody and recapturing that sense of connection and affection, but begins to slowly strip away meaning itself, where just motivating yourself in the ordinary sense becomes a constant struggle. You’re left with that “what’s the use” feeling, and you begin steadily isolating yourself, or take on a desperate feeling of grasping for whatever you can get, just as long as you don’t have to be alone. You can begin settling for anything, or considering a relationship that you normally wouldn’t even entertain, while finding that it not only doesn’t satisfy the need to connect and feel apart of someone, but makes you feel another kind of loneliness that’s confusing, because you feel even more lonely when you’re with someone. Or it can cause you to go deeper into your isolation and feeling disconnected from people in general, and begins a long journey of accepting that you’re going to be alone, and trying to figure out how to honestly be okay with it. You accept your fate and slowly disappear into a numbing silence where your own thoughts are your only companion. You take up hobbies, transfer your affection to pets, or delve deeper into your work, and while it doesn’t alleviate the loneliness, it does offer a temporary distraction that gives you something to do while you continue to try and figure out what you’re going to do.
While many people say they don’t want to be needed, be responsible for others, and feel burdened by having to provide for the well-being of others, in reality, those are the things that give our life meaning, and give us a clear sense of purpose and the ability to give to others knowing we make a difference in their lives, and without us, they wouldn’t be okay. When we’re apart of something greater than ourselves, and build our lives around others, we’re motivated in the most natural sense and have a constant feeling of love and affection in our life. True pleasure and contentment come from sharing life with another, and others, and from whatever gives us a sense of responsibility, love and devotion for and towards. As humans, we’re not meant to be alone, and a life well lived is lived in the service of others whom we love enough to make sacrifices. In this sense, sacrifice is the true demonstration of love, and intensifies our feeling of commitment and living a life of purpose and meaning.
If we find ourselves alone in life, and seemingly without a prospect for union, then we devote our lives to others and to a cause that takes the place of family, and gives us a sense of duty, service and purpose. If we know we matter in someone’s life, that we’re making a difference, and that the world is somehow better because of us, than it gives our life the meaning and purpose that we all need. It gives us direction and a sense of accomplishment. It gives us a channel for giving and receiving, for contributing and participating in something beyond ourselves. We’re only truly happy when we feel a valuable part of something greater than ourselves. To live a life of purpose is to live a life of service.

 

Dr. Linda Gadbois

 

About the author:
Dr. Linda is a Spiritual Scientist and scholar of Hermetic Sciences and Ancient Wisdom traditions. She’s a professional educator and trainer for all areas of personal transformation, self-creation, mind development, and soul/spiritual evolution. She practices Integrative Medicine with a special emphasis on Psychology and Creative therapies. She conducts ongoing classes, Playshops, and Adventure Seminars, and is available for private or group training, mentoring, and speaking engagements.
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Life Crisis and the Nature of Personal Transformation

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Many people turn away from or choose to not undergo the process of personal transformation required as soul growth through the means of birthing your higher-self through the use of choice and will within the everyday life of their normal consciousness. This is because it can be very disruptive and completely change the way you live your life, and “who” you are in the most essential sense. It takes a great deal of courage and mortal fortitude to brave and endure the process of the life you’ve built your identity around completely falling apart, crumbling beyond repair, and leaving your life, often giving you a painfully deepened sense of isolation and abandonment. While being completely alone in life can be one of the most painful experiences there are, leaving us constantly searching for meaning and purpose, being devastated financially, raped of your dignity, and outcast by those you once loved and thought loved you, brings about a new kind of pain that can bring you to the brink of total destruction. Because of this tendency to resist it at all costs and not being willing to consciously choose it, many who have made a soul agreement to undergo the transformative process where you enter it consciously and are aware of it, think about it, have premonitions of it coming, experience it instead as happening “to you” without choice or control. We often even initiate it through unconscious behaviors and emotional turmoil that are sabotaging and actually work to set the inevitable into motion. What we deem self-sabotaging behaviors may not be a bad thing, but actually a necessary part of our evolution where we unconsciously act out in situations we’re not happy in and often feel tormented by in the essential sense, even though they might appear quite fortunate and comfortable on the surface.

 
For those destined for complete transformation of the body and souls as a form of spiritual mission or dedication that comes as a turbulent inner struggle and decisions, chances are we undergo many forms of transformation as challenges and hardships that seem to be cast upon us without choice or desire, that we find the strength to manage in some way, that ends up growing and developing us, while perhaps drastically changing the direction of our life because of them, that seem to be preparing us through practice for the larger transformations that to come at a mature age where their effects are more drastic and prominent and the patterns of our life more set and fixed. Yet, even in these smaller, life-altering events, we may find, looking back on them, that we participated in bringing them about through some form of inner struggle that they seemed to resolve, or lead us into because we knew we had no choice morally.

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These experiences started for me early in life, and so I became accustomed to them in a strange sort of way where drastic and constant changes became the norm. My childhood was very unstable, and I ended up running away and living on the streets, not because I was abandoned, but because I chose to. I wasn’t willing to compromise myself or allow the events to take place that were inevitable if I continued living at home, so I left because I felt safer on the streets than I did at home. At least on the streets I had some control, and could, through my own decisions and actions keep myself safe. Though this led into a traumatic time in my life of tremendous hardship and uncertainty, I also grew in strength and confidence, and was able to set up a life where I not only took care of myself, but continued to go to school, be placed in advanced learning, and graduated high school two years early with a college scholarship. All without nobody realizing I wasn’t living at home.

 
Later, when my son was born, he had health problems that I had to go through extreme lengths to get diagnosed, because even though I was intuitively picking up on it, the symptoms were common and subtle, and no one believed me. When I finally got help with a diagnosis, it was within hours of saving his life, and brought on a year long process of multiple surgeries, living in the hospital and out of my car, being ruined financially and devastated emotionally. I had to draw on a part of myself I didn’t know was there, and came into the full realization of a higher consciousness that I could access at will, and use to make calculated decisions and perform operations that would later be seen as miraculous. I came to know the meaning of unconditional love, total surrender to the creative process of life, and the incredibly powerful sense of myself that came from realizing that I would die for my son. This experience changed me at the deepest level of my sense of self, matured me exponentially, and gave me incredible moral strength and complete confidence in my intuition and my ability to handle anything. Through this experience I built a working relationship with the higher power that’s active in my life and available as willpower.

 
Years later, after going through financial bankruptcy, and struggling to keep a failed marriage together, flirting with drug addiction and encountering the darker side of seemingly normal things, after a series of premonitions, my husband was abruptly killed by being stabbed through the heart while in the stall of a bathroom, set my life into a tailspin prolonged by a year long trial in our home town of 2,400 people. Needless to say, it was the event of the decade, and got constant media attention. His death brought me face to face with the reality of what happens when and after we die. I developed an insatiable sense of wonder about our true spiritual nature, the meaning of life, and how all things serve a purpose in terms of the experiences and life lessons they set in motion, in which we are lured and drawn deeply into as the “point of no return”. This event and everything that ensued from it completely changed the direct of my life, set into motion a whole new set of questions and a deep desire to know the true nature that underlies and orchestrates things. At 30 years of age, my true spiritual quest into the unknown fully kicked into motion and changed the course of my life and how I looked at things.

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Even though I continued to experience other events that continued morphing and changing the direction of my life, most seemed rather easy and void of real pain after this. As my path steadily led into a serious and devoted study of spiritual sciences, a decision to return to college, and when approaching my thesis for my Ph.D. in Spiritual Sciences, both of which centered around personal transformation, I began realizing what I called my “soul agreement” in regards to mastering this process, not by having it seemingly thrust upon me through what seemed like tragedy and trauma in which I had no control or conscious say so in, but as a willed experience that I cooperatively engaged in.

 
My true dedication became apparent when my college insisted I write about it as a clinical study or form of research project, that used and cited other professionals work as a means of proving or validating my ideas, which of course would have been a spin-off of what’s already been done, instead of writing about it from experience, which is what I was proposing. I wanted to undergo it in a completely conscious manner so I could capture the experience of it, and know through the experience what we have to access as a means of “making it”. And not letting it overcome us or do us in . . . which of course, it can. I felt so strongly about this, that when I couldn’t get it approved, I declined the Ph.D. program, and went for my Doctorate instead. Upon graduation, after I got over the tremendous feeling of relief and congratulating myself (it’s a lot of work), a voice inside of me calmly said . . . “now its time to practice what you’ve learned theoretically”. A serious feeling came over me as a form of dread, and I knew the real work had only just begun and that my life up to this point served only as a preview for what was to come. And from that point forward my life as I knew and built it, began systematically falling apart and leaving. And even in the moments when I desperately tried to grab onto some form of security and stability long enough to get my bearings, I couldn’t. Nothing worked. And all I seemed to see and encounter was the incredibly false nature of things; of people, relationships, communities, companies, government . . . everything around me seemed to be revealing a hidden nature that while I knew and suspected it was there before, didn’t really know for sure. Then I began realizing that everything else was changing because I was changing, and as what I thought was my true nature began falling away and I was no longer able to use it to create my reality, the equally false nature of everybody and everything began dissolving and all I could see and sense was who they really were at their deepest, most essential parts. And it all but devastated me. Even though I thought that I knew the true reality of things through my extreme intellect and well developed intuition, I quickly came to realize in very abrupt terms, that this was not the case!

 
As I lost just about everything and who I was by way of what I owned, the job I had, the amount of money I made, and the image I presented and experienced myself through, my relationship with everything else changed also, and the ones based on the false image I had so successfully created and the confident dynamic persona I had perfected, changed, revealing an entirely different side to things, and everything I had become accustomed to and dependent on “left” my life. I came to know extreme forms of humility, abandonment, surrender, sacrifice, unbearable insecurity, and the depths of anguish encountered at the bottom of what seems like the bottomless pit of the dark night of the soul, when we find ourselves in a place the eye does not see, where we can no longer grab onto things, ideas, roles, people, situations, relationships, or jobs to pull ourselves up with and provide us with some form of hope and relief, we come into another realization, one that at first is foreign to us and even awkward to contemplate, we begin noticing and sensing a feeling deep within us that seems to be reaching out to us, longing for our desolate gaze, which the moment we become truly aware of it, begins taking hold and growing in us, while everything else fades away. As it grows inside of us it begins fortifying us with a new sense of life and energy. As we begin drawing on it out of the depths of despair, we’re filled with a renewed sense of hope and moral comfort. The more attention we give it, the more it swells inside of us, softly seducing us with its soft penetrating glow.

 
In this final moment of drawing on our inner strength, free from the confines and affects of the material world, we begin realizing our true identity as being in this world, but not of it. We surrender and give ourselves over, not to an external force, but to an internal one. One that can’t be lost or taken away. One that resides in us eternally and unconditionally. One that’s always been there and never leaves us, but requires our recognition and invitation. Once this happens, and we begin settling into a new kind of spiritual wealth, where simply lose interest in material wealth, no longer crave excess or nonessential ideas and things, and begin experiencing a newfound freedom born out of a lack of attachment to material things, and we begin working consciously to simplify and streamline our life. We lose selfish interests and turn our attention instead to helping others by contributing in a more meaningful way to benefit others on their own spiritual journeys into self-healing through self-recognition and realization.

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We come to realize that forgiveness itself is an illusion, because those we imagine have betrayed or forsaken us, honestly don’t know what they do because they’re caught up in the illusion of their life and feel warranted and justified in their actions. No one can attack or hurt us unless we’re invested in the same illusion and therefore deem ourselves hurtable or attackable. When we separate ourselves from the illusion we normally share with others as a primordial form of ignorance, we no longer react to them. They can no longer cause a reaction in us in response to them. They exercise no control over us. They no longer affect us. We no longer share the same reality that’s producing their behavior towards us. We realize with great clarity and absolution, that their perception and behavior has nothing to do with us, and is simply an expression of who they are and the reality they live in as a projection of their own mind. Through this realization we come to realize there’s nothing to forgive, because they don’t have the ability to harm us. They have inflicted no pain on us, and we have not suffered at their mercy. We no longer share the error of their thinking, and so it doesn’t become a part of our experience.

 
When we shift our very perception of life, what things mean, how they appear to us, the true nature of reality and what’s happening in the true underlying sense, we move to a higher vibration and cultivate a different kind of awareness that no longer relates or partakes in the lower levels of consciousness still shrouded with the veil of unconsciousness. Once you know, you can’t not know. Once you see and realize the true reality of the material realm that disguises ideas with outer appearances, you don’t even notice the outer appearance anymore, but experience directly their inner nature instead. You begin seeing people as they are being distinctly separate from you, and therefore unable to affect you because you’ve changed how you enter into relationship with them, and everything else changes accordingly. People who used to upset you, cause you to feel anger and hatred or disgust, you now view with compassion because you realize fully that they are consumed with ignorance and basically unaware of what they’re actually doing, and more importantly, because their consciousness no longer resonates with yours, and therefore doesn’t enter into you and produce an effect in you . . . so they can’t hurt you or even disturb your internal peace of mind, because they exist outside of and apart from you.

 
When we’re no longer affected by the emotions and mental projections of others, not prone to addictions and cravings that command our will, and we become passionless in terms of worldly pleasures and success, we detach from material possessions as the means of providing us with our identity and sense of self. We detach from external outcomes, and maintain our sense of self from an internal source that’s eternally peaceful and only affected by the consciousness that inhabits the internal plane, which is benevolent and selfless. Our journey into our true nature is a transformation that moves us from being determined by the material world which is built out of a shared illusion, to being determined by the power of our own soul’s consciousness and true connection to the spiritual realm of immortality, eternal strength, and all pervading peace and compassion for those still lost in the illusions of their own making, without ever even realizing it.

 

Dr. Linda Gadbois

Transformational Coaching

 

About the author:
Dr. Linda is a Spiritual Scientist and scholar of Hermetic Sciences and Ancient Wisdom traditions. She’s a professional educator and trainer for all areas of personal transformation, self-creation, mind development, and soul/spiritual evolution. She practices Integrative Medicine with a special emphasis on Psychology and Creative therapies. She conducts ongoing classes, Playshops, and Adventure Seminars, and is available for private or group training, mentoring, and speaking engagements.
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