Alchemy and the Process of Initiation – Transformation and Growth through Challenges and Ordeals

The ancient art known as “Alchemy” dealt with the idea of soul purification and self-creation through masterful use of the will. It works through Universal Laws that govern all of the material world as a primary form of mind-over-matter, or the mind’s ability to willfully direct the behaviors of the body (subconscious) and determine what type of energies as states of consciousness we take on, become one with, and bring into expression as a way of creating ourselves by way of them. It works through the same laws that govern the chemistry of the body, where, when two or more substances are combined, they form a chemical reaction as biological processes of transformation. All change and transmutation comes from new combinations of some kind that form new relationships as a unique variable that alters it from its original state.

The alchemical process acts first to “purify” the substance (soul) to be transformed through various forms of changing the solution by filtering and separation, that identify and remove all impurities acquired through previous combinations and amalgamations, returning it to its virgin state. This process takes repeated steps of breaking down existing conditions and established patterns as active qualities, refining them through a process of distillation, and removing all corrupt aspects as weaknesses, vices, and vulnerabilities. Once returned to its original state, the true aspects of its character can then fully express and be developed into strengths as the means of true self-creation that comes from self-awareness, self-knowledge, and intentional actions and deeds. We can then act “on ourselves” to develop ourselves in very distinct ways by choosing what qualities we want to intentionally embody, become one with, and bring into expression as a way of apprehending those qualities and developing our character to include them.

       The Law of the Tetragrammaton or Tetrad (4), demonstrates this process and method of “becoming” through the Dyad (Vesica Pisces) as the blending together of two energy fields, joined at the center, where outside energies serve to stimulate and awaken those same energies in us, and together in the overlapping area, form an interference pattern as the reconfiguration of that pattern in both to form a new variation. This new variation of the same quality and idea, births the Triad as its offspring as an inner or imagined idea that provides the subconscious pattern for producing its outer equivalent as a projection or reflection, birthing its correspondence as an outer expression or experience of reality, represented by the Tetrad.

This same principle is demonstrated in the most primary law of all, the Law of Vibration, which states that whenever we vibrate in harmony with something else, we act to magnetically draw it into us through sympathetic induction, blending with it, and both of our complementary, yet variable vibrations influence each other and begin vibrating in-sync, forming coherence as a new vibratory rate that together forms a new pattern. This law forms the very foundation as a guided process for not only realizing “how” we’re being shaped all the time by whatever we associate and interact with energetically, but for how to engage in and use that same process intentionally as a means of developing ourselves.

The same process of returning a solid substance to a fluid state, purifying it by breaking down and dissolving all impurities and corruption, then reforming it through new combinations, occurs naturally in life anytime we’re faced with challenges, ordeals, major life crisis, and extreme forms of hardship and loss, where we’re forced to reevaluate our life and values, and embrace our identity with a full sense of awareness. It’s easy to see that the only time we change or grow in some way, is when we have to in order to overcome or negotiate a new situation that presents a problem or unfamiliar territory. It’s only when we’re taken out of our comfort zone, our ordinary conditions, circumstances, and situations that we’ve become accustomed to, and thrown into brand new, unexpected situations that we’re forced to respond by acting in a new and deliberate way. Where we go through the process in our mind of not knowing what to do, no previous experience or memory to draw off of or repeat, and we go through a decision process that requires us to willfully act it out, usually going against our own natural and habitual tendencies. Only in these moments are we truly self-creating in a fully aware manner. We’re initiating and producing our own reality that brings us into a new feeling and sense of ourselves. We embody qualities that we’ve never really expressed or developed before, and they transform us as a result. While in these moments, we’re back into a position, often for the first time as an adult, of having to make conscious decisions in every instance of what we’re going to do, how we’re going to be, and what we’re going to act intentionally to create.

        The process of initiation in the ancient mysteries, prepared the initiate by putting them in extremely challenging situations that were designed to invoke extreme fear and a deep sense of insecurity, which revealed their will to either give-up or give-in, or to persevere and push through difficulties, developing great mental fortitude through the process. The object was to not only become fearless, but to also be able to remain calm, highly focused, clear minded, and confident in extreme situations of all kinds. This came through the ability to not allow the energy challenging you to enter into your sphere of consciousness and alter your state of mind to match and be “like it”. This is what you might call a form of reverse engineering of the initial process of alteration through “combining and coupling” represented by the Dyad. In this process you deflect the energy, keeping it outside of you, refrain from reacting to it in any manner while staying centered and grounded internally, and in doing so, you neutralize the energy and act instead to influence and direct it through your mental projections and actions.

All of life evolves out of various combinations as the relationships of complementary opposites that act on each other to transform each other to be more alike. Every person or being that we meet or interact with, is acting naturally just through the nature of the interaction to make us like them, and we act to make them like us. This is what all relationships are, a natural method of transformation through adaptation and modification that (re)forms a new whole as a variation. This process is always going on between us and everything around us all the time at the subconscious, unaware level of the mind. We are constantly absorbing, integrating, assimilating, and becoming “like” the energy around us as a basic form of evolution that keeps us in the same state and condition as the environment we exist in, function as a part of, and have to survive in. Once we fully understand this law and fact, we have the tools necessary to work by way of that same law to consciously direct and influence the operation.

All energy is a form of consciousness that exists as “qualities” and feelings that naturally produce certain types of thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. The spiritual-energetic world exists in a parallel dimension to the physical as a hierarchical structure. Whatever exists on a “lower plane” is fully contained within the higher plane as its foundation. The higher plane, which contains the entire lower plane, is what acts to govern and sustain that plane. The invisible plane of energy, which is consciousness, is what shapes matter as essence into form through imagined thoughts. An idea introduced into the mind as a frequency or feeling, stimulates and initiates a thought process that forms it into an image of some kind as a reality in the mind’s eye (3rd eye), that’s further developed and evolved through a narration as internal dialogue. The entire physical, manifest world is produced and animated by consciousness as thought, intention, and imagination. And it’s through this same process, by working with the laws of the higher plane governing the lower plane that we direct and work with the energies of the lower plane.

       Once we return to a virgin state through the process of being broke down through constant challenges and crisis, where all illusions that prevented us from seeing ourselves and life as it really is dissolve, revealing only what’s real and eternal and unchangeable, we’re in the position to not only take over control of our own development, but can develop the necessary capacities of the mind that prevent us from being influenced, altered, and corrupted by others. All energy as states that produce emotional realities can be directed and brought into a submissive state by the will. We can control and regulate all energy within our own mental sphere (immediate surroundings) by exercising our will to direct it. This is not the same thing as “imposing our will on others” in an attempt to control and influence them to think, feel, and behave in a certain way, but rather to exercise full dominion over ourselves and our own mind and soul. Alchemy doesn’t concern itself with the idea or need to somehow change others, but only with the mastery necessary to become fully self-determined and self-controlled. The best way we have of influencing others is by controlling our own state and behaviors in how we interact with them, which influences them to “match us”.

Once we realize that our mind exists as a spherical field of energy that not only permeates and surrounds our body, encapsulating it, but also extends out into the environment around us quite some distance, and is always mingling with and taking on the energy of everything else, we can begin acting deliberately to regulate our energy field by using our will and imagination to determine what we allow in to become a part of us, and what we keep out or deflect, so it doesn’t affect or alter us. If we learn how to tune into the energy in any situation and become aware of how it interacts with us to transform us through resonance, we can learn how to “sense it” by feeling it while imagining its quality, motives, and behavior, while keeping it “outside of us”. We can then realize that people who are willfully projecting through some form of intensity, and those who live out of and are always expressing and projecting strong emotions of some sort, can only “enter into us” and infect us, becoming a part of our mind, if we choose to let them.

Energetic interactions take place naturally at the subconscious level, where, even though we realize how strongly we’re affected by them, we don’t realize what’s actually going on in the objective sense. We don’t realize that by becoming aware of what operates at the unconscious level, we can learn how to work with it consciously (with awareness). We can imagine an invisible barrier around us as the outer edge of our mental sphere where ideas and emotions being projected at us by others are allowed to reflect and “spread out” so we can see them as if “looking through a transparent image”, where we can “read them accurately” while preventing them from entering our mind and altering our state accordingly. By practicing this, we can remain calm, centered, and unaffected while in the midst of extremes and intensity of any kind. By remaining neutral in the presence of projected emotions we act to neutralize and diffuse them. But most importantly, we exercise the ability to regulate our own mind and body. This is a key ability of vital importance in terms of intentional self-creation.

        In this same manner we can consciously choose energy that we do want to blend with and become one with as a means of intentionally acquiring the same qualities. While we tend to use terms like “acquire”, “apprehend”, or” get”, to describe the energy and consciousness we embody as a means of developing qualities in ourselves, the fact is we don’t ever “get energy” as qualities “from” something else outside of us, but they act instead, through resonance, to “awaken” and bring into an active state those same qualities that are already “in” us. We then develop them through repetitive expression to become a prominent part of our character. Anything that we consistently develop through expression and interaction of some sort becomes a habit as second nature, which means we begin doing it naturally in an automatic fashion without direct awareness, having to think about it, or exerting intentional effort.

This same process of union as combining and coupling with someone or something else as the natural means of transforming and growing, is represented in what’s called the “chemical marriage” of Alchemy, as the relationship between the active and passive forces of the same mind and soul, and the conscious minds ability to direct, guide, and create by way of the subconscious mind as a unified and harmonious act. It’s learning how to make an adjustment through an understanding of sympathy and antipathy, attraction and repulsion, magnetizing and projecting. By learning how to use our own personal will to seed and work to create through our subconscious, we create both ourselves and our reality in an intentional and purposeful manner.

       Likewise, the burning away of impurities as character flaws, unconscious complexes and tendencies, incorrect evaluations and calculations, or bad habits we developed as unconscious conditioning, we can resolve our bad (self-destructive) karma and create a more positive and beneficial form of karma. Redemption comes by first bringing what’s operating in our life unconsciously into conscious awareness where we can not only see what we’re doing and why, but we can also begin working with it consciously to resolve it. All manifestations produced by actions can be cancelled out and brought back into a balanced state through equilibration of opposites. It’s only by realizing and owning our own part in things that we see clearly what we’re doing in any situation that acting to co-create it, whether passively or actively, that we can willfully change our own perceptions and behaviors. It’s by counteracting an idea that we transform it by reformulating it, bringing what’s out of balance (emphasized) and being done unconsciously back into balance through awareness that brings realization. The realization alone is what acts to dissolve and transform the illusion. To redeem ourselves from an attitude and the actions that result from it, is to form and embody the opposite attitude and action, and repeat it consistently until it becomes automatic and something that we do without thinking about it. We can only be transformed and evolved by what becomes a habit as an essential part of our nature (through reprogramming our subconscious).

Those of us who came into this life with many difficulties, challenges, and ordeals to overcome, are naturally walked through a process of initiation as soul purification, often without realizing it. Others intentionally choose a hard life because there’s a desire in them to meet and overcome difficulties. Still others refuse to compromise their dignity in a world that teaches conformity at the cost of morality, and in doing so, welcome the consequences of integrity, which can often seem brutal. All growth and development, in the sense of being the soul’s only true goal and purpose in life, is considered an act of love from a higher, spiritual perspective. It’s only when we’re challenged and overwhelmed and we reign as victor, that we’re exalted. The greater our fall, the more exalted our rising. It’s only when we push through tremendous odds, and when faced with devastation and wrought with unimaginable grief, in those darkest moments when we’re forced to reach down into our unknown depths of our self to find our true source of light and power that we ascend to the higher rungs by virtue of our own volition.

Dr. Linda Gadbois

Spiritual Life Coach and Integrative Mind-Body Medicine Mentor

Creativity – The Relationship between Choice, Will, and Creating Reality

It doesn’t take long to realize that in life all things exist in relationship to each other. There’s really no such thing as an independent or solitary act. Everything comes as a result of something else, or as a synchronized series of events that play out over a period of time. While we can say that “no choice” is a choice, or that unconscious decisions that are seemingly made without awareness or in a deliberate manner, that are based primarily on feelings, emotions, or impulses of some sort, are still using your will because you’re willingly acting them out, this is passive use of the will that likewise creates in our life in an unconscious manner. Choice and will, like all faculties of the mind and soul, exist in both active and passive form based on awareness and deliberate action, or without direct awareness and in an automatic fashion.

Anytime we’re aware of choice, and we negotiate it in an intentional manner, it usually comes as a decision between a conditioned response and a conflict of some sort as a conscience or inner awareness that makes us hesitate and resist it, and so we look for other options. Whenever we make an “actual” and true decision in a fully aware and intentional manner, we naturally leave all other options we were previously debating behind and move forward to create the choice we’ve made as our reality. We remove our attention from all other ideas, become single-minded, focusing exclusively on the reality of our choice, and we direct all of our attention and actions into creating it. Once our mind is made up and all conflict dissolves, our only movement becomes directed by the imagined reality of our decision, and we act systematically to create it. This is why “choice and free will” are always presented together, because they’re different aspects of the same creative process.

If we experience the inability to do something that we believe we’ve chosen to do, it’s due to the fact that we haven’t truly made the decision for it, but are still bartering, debating, and negotiating it. It can be showing us that we still harbor inner conflict around it, still have attachments of some kind to what we’re deciding against, or we have conflicting beliefs and values of some sort that are holding us to indecision. Often our emotions and feelings are contradicting it or wanting something different than our rational, reasoning mind, and so our mind is divided. Anytime there’s a division between the subconscious and conscious mind, with one aspect of the mind acting to contradict or counteract the other one, we sit in limbo not knowing what to do, always going back and forth, sabotaging our own efforts, never actually able to settle on one or the other, until someone or something makes the decision for us and we no longer have a choice in the matter.

While there’s a tendency for society to tell you to pick “one over the other”, to follow your heart and not your mind (as if they’re different things), the fact is, it’s always about a balance between the two. An alignment that forms a single mind as a single goal, free of all conflict, that works dynamically in-sync with each other to create the reality of that choice. Anytime we pose one aspect against another, we’re doomed to failure or a seeming success that merely forms the foundation for inner turmoil and conflict to play out as a constant realization of betraying ourselves in some way. Thought and emotion, intellect and feeling, heart and head, are always unified, one producing and sustaining the other. There’s no such thing as a division in the true sense of the word. The masculine and feminine aspects are only capable of creating when forming union that produces an offspring that’s a combination of the two. They always act in unison as “one idea” that produces the material reality as a correspondence of that idea.

The Power of Emotions

Making a “true decision” where all aspects are aligned and agree, can often be quite difficult, and may actually come over a period of time while different aspects that negate the desired outcome in some way are played out and explored in greater depth, so that the necessary realizations can be obtained, which serves to confirm what you need to decide. Our subconscious, which is the seat of all of our conditioning as our mental paradigm, habitual tendencies, regular emotional states, and dynamics that are magnetic and compulsive in nature, seeks only to maintain the status quo as a form of self-preservation by continuing to play out the thematic dynamics that we’ve built our identity around, and need to keep playing out somehow in order to maintain our “sense of self”.

We keep casting ourselves in the roles we know how to play, and telling the story we know how to tell and do so in a natural, automatic, and compulsive fashion. We’re magnetically drawn to it even when intellectually and through reasoning we know we don’t want to be or shouldn’t. It works through our emotions, which are often gripping and intense, holding us captive to passions and intense emotional experiences that saturate our body with the chemistry and hormones of the emotions, satisfying a form of addiction. Emotions, being the motivating force of the subconscious mind and body, which is habitual and automatic in nature, are habit forming and we literally become addicted to them, even when we hate ourselves for doing it. Emotions, which are the driving force of instinct, are designed to produce automatic behavior that don’t require will, thought and decision, or self-awareness of any kind. We become addicted to pain just as easily as we do pleasure, because they’re both a drug produced internally that we become dependent on and use not only to create and maintain our state of mind, but also to create our reality out of, which is how we act in an indirect manner on ourselves to create ourselves.

Anytime emotions and passions go against reasoning and rational thought, they nearly always win, because they’re experience as a strong internal sensation that’s very compelling with a form of urgency, whereas clear thought is more neutral and something we seem to experience in more of a dissociated perspective of witnessing as being outside of or above the situation looking at it from the perspective of a “whole” rather than in it as a “part of it”. Once emotions take hold and grip us in some way, usually through memory of some kind that’s used to create in the present, it tends to cloud and control our thinking through a form of seductive persuasion, making it difficult to resist.

When this happens, decisions usually come as a gradual process, where once the desire to change becomes persistent, and we continue playing out the emotional dramas preventing us from implementing them, we begin having realizations about them that start dissolving the illusion we’ve built around them, loosening their grip, and they begin disintegrating and falling away. Once we have a notion as the desire to change in some manner, breaking an established pattern, it tends to steadily grow until it reaches fruition as an actual decision that we begin acting on to make it an actual reality, leaving the old behind and starting something new.

The Power of Belief

In a like manner, we can appear to have made a decision, and started it in motion, while maintaining a belief of some kind that prevents it, causes a feeling of conflict somehow, or results in what seems like the inability to take action, or not knowing what to do. Beliefs can be quite difficult to identify because they form the very basis of our experience of reality, and we often mistake them as being “fact or true”. Belief and the reality formed from it is the most basic and prevalent demonstration of the “power of the mind to create reality”. We create the experience of our beliefs perfectly without realizing that it’s our own creation, and is not real or true at all in the objective sense. Because many of them come from actual experience in terms of how we “interpreted” the events of our life by telling ourselves a story about them, we don’t realize that we actually made them up using our imagination (will). Likewise, we’re also taught certain ideas that we accepted as being factual or true, and use as the foundation for building entire networks that are all based on the same belief system, and accepting the ideas of others that were given to us and willingly adopted by us as our own thoughts. Usually the only way to upsurge a belief and bring it back into a fluid and negotiable state, is by introducing contradictory evidence that proves it wrong, one-sided, or reveals it as a skewed version. While many choose instead to argue against, deny, or ignore altogether anything that serves to shine light on the validity of long held beliefs, this too is a decision that we willingly act out and employ as the means of creating the reality it implies.

When we always act to defend our beliefs instead of being willing to consider other possibilities, we condemn ourselves to the confinement of the reality of those beliefs. When we feel we’ve made a clear and conscious decision to change our life in some way, no longer running on memory and autopilot, and are confronted with what seems like the inability to act in order to create it, or the “path to take” in moving in the new direction, it’s usually due to a conflicting and limiting belief of some sort. We know when both aspects of our mind are in alignment with each other when we make a decision that lacks any kind of inner conflict, and we feel a sense of passion and urgency in acting to create it. We don’t have to figure anything out, we’re not stumped or confused, lacking motivation of the drive to do it, but instead, from that point on direct all of our attention and energy into actively moving forward on it and systematically producing it.

Knowing What to Do

The idea of being aware of the need or ability to make a decision puts us in the position of actually creating in a conscious and intentional manner. We create our decisions by focusing and concentrating our full attention on them, and consistently acting on them in whatever way is immediately apparent. We move forward with the attitude of being and doing. It’s very natural for us to not necessarily “know what to do” or how to be when we’re stepping into something new, because we don’t have memory or previous experience to go on. All new actions and creations come to us, not as a whole idea or plan laid out in detail for us to follow, but as a desire for what we’ve chosen, and a notion about how to start. If we simply act on what we know to do while remaining focused on our intention and desired outcome, it starts a process in motion that comes as an intuitive and synchronistic unfolding where one idea leads to another, and investigating or penetrating one aspect reveals the next aspect as the “next step”. We’re often required to have faith in the fact that if we simply act on what we do know and therefore step into it and start the process in motion, that the next step will become apparent.

Stepping into the Unknown

All well laid out “action plans”, so to speak, come as the result of rehashing and reformulating past memories to form what appears to be a new idea, yet in reality, is merely a new version of an old idea. When we form a truly new idea as a reality for creating, it usually comes through a part of us that’s always been there, urging us on to “become” who we truly are as our dream for our life that we negotiated away in an attempt to conform to the ideas of society imposed on us and the need to fit in, and we step into the flow of life by embracing an inspiration that comes to us seemingly from out of nowhere (though its often been there forever), that takes hold within us, becoming relentless and persistent. Once we receive it as an intimate connection that appeals to our true self, urging us on and encouraging us, it can almost become an obsession. An idea for our life that we can’t seem to let go of because it speaks to us with a vivid honesty as a form of promise that restores hope and the fulfillment of our true purpose and mission in life.

All truly inspired ideas come to us by resonating with our deepest parts, the ones that we remain unfamiliar with while having a deep longing for, crying out to be free, shrouded and suffocated by illusions that we blindly accept as our fate, surrendering our true destiny and condemning our soul to a wasted and meaningless life. These form the big, life-altering decisions. The ones that are truly difficult to make, because in doing so, our identity and who we’ve been up to that point becomes compromised, and is no longer validated and sustained. To follow it, make the decision to surrender to our higher calling, means our entire previous life situation and roles will change, sometimes drastically, and we’ll be left scrambling, faced with the unknown, new conditions and circumstances, a new way of being that requires trust and a belief in ourselves and our inherent ability to know what to do when faced with brand new options that only guarantee uncertainty.

When we make a decision to be and do something different in our life, especially when we’re older and have an established lifestyle and habitual patterns that we’ve built our identity around, where we have no past memory to go off of, we realize that the path unfolds through the series of decisions we’re making moment by moment as we go. In this total newness comes true creativity. Every decision, no matter how minute, becomes about “who am I?” What do I want to create? Who am I going to be, here, now, in this moment? What am I going to do, how am I going to act, and what consequences will result? We start getting a true feeling for how we actually create our lives through our everyday choices and actions, often for the first time as an adult.

Once we’re cast into a life that we just sort of ended up in through an unconscious and natural process of growing up, where decisions seem to be made for us by our situation and responsibilities, and we fall into the habit of making decisions in an unconscious manner where they’re made for us or we simply accept them, and even when we maintain an awareness of what we want to do instead, we choose to give it up in favor of what we feel we need and should do. After a while we find ourselves living life in an automatic and habitual fashion where the only decisions we have to make is what to eat for dinner, or what to watch on TV, and even those decisions can be made for us by others. We can slowly fall into the reality of never having to make decisions and actually creating something new, and instead just act to maintain the habitual pattern already established and go with the flow by coasting through our life.

To make true decisions that bring about change and create in a conscious way requires a form of courage and willingness to create something new and unfamiliar. It can mean giving up security and established success, or a glorified self-image, and wiping the slate clean, starting all over with a brand new idea for yourself and your life. When we make one decision and actually act to create the reality of that decision, it naturally leads to the need to consistently make more decisions, because you’re the creator and they’re not being made for you by someone else. When this happens a new sense of freedom comes about, and you start getting a real sense of who you actually are. Anytime and unconscious process becomes conscious, we gain tremendous insights into unfamiliar aspects of ourselves that remained hidden, subdued, or just barely out of sight. Naturally with this awareness and freedom comes the true responsibility for what we create and who we become through our own volition. We can no longer dodge responsibility or blame our shortcomings on others. This realization alone can be as terrifying as it is empowering.

        Many people go through their entire life with decisions that are being made for them by others, or simply complying with the general consensus and trained mindset of society. Many “fall into a situation” in what seems like a haphazard method of chance, because they were creating from an unaware state with no realization of the consequences or end results of the actions. Many start off not knowing for sure what they want to do, then as they go along just end up in situations that seem to dictate the course of their life for them, and they feel trapped, or something about it becomes more important than their freedom to decide, and so they choose it instead, going with it till the situation ends or drastically changes somehow, then, they’re right back where they started. Drifting aimlessly into an abyss with no sense of purpose or vision for their life, scared and filled with an unbearable sense of dread and insecurity. Having lived so long without the ability to create through active use of choice and will, they feel lost and confused, and as if they have no ability to move their life in a new direction. Usually, without even knowing what direction they want their life to move in. When this happens, they usually simply find a new situation that they can wrap themselves around, and continue on their way, choosing to remain unconscious in the most basic sense of the word.

Creativity

All true creativity comes through a balanced and aligned mind, where feelings, emotions, and desire are the motivating force and formative factor of thought as an imagined idea. To decide on something is to choose an idea that you then act to willfully create. You direct all of your attention (undivided mind) and activities into the fulfillment of your decision. Choice gives us a vision as a firm idea that we’re then required to create. In this same way, an artist decides what feeling they want to capture and express by becoming one with it. They envision that idea as a sensory reality in a way that invokes a love for it, and then they go about doing what’s necessary to create it. They engage in whatever course of action is necessary to produce it. Naturally this requires great skill that only comes through constant practice and a sense of diligence.

So if you’re struggling with creating what you want, or making the necessary decisions in your life to better it somehow, and you’re always going back and forth, or never actually being able to bring yourself to do what seems like a “big move”, just allow yourself to reflect on and become aware of all that comes up in relation to it as a conflicting feeling or idea. Then, go into each conflicting idea in depth in order to gain whatever realization about it that you need in order to make a true decision as to whether or not to continue with it, tweak and reformulate it, or leave it behind and quit thinking about it altogether. As you gain insight into what it is that’s preventing you from making a decision, you’ll know what other decisions you need to make first. Because decisions for change require sacrifice of some kind, they can produce a lot of inner turmoil that will need resolving in order to reside peacefully in that decision.

We know when we’ve actually made a decision because we’re no longer debating it while considering other options, and we simply go about creating it. We hold an idea firmly in our mind with no inner conflict or anxiety around what we have to give up in achieving it, and we feel a sense of purpose and inspiration in regards to it. A feeling of devotion and dedication to it fills us, and we feel peaceful and content in the reality of it. All distractions fade away and focus all activity towards producing it. We move forward with a clear conscience and a feeling of certainty, and no longer look back or miss what we left behind. We’re filled with a sense of excitement and anticipation, alive with the true power to create the life we desire in an intentional and deliberate manner. We gain a new sense of ourselves that becomes a self-perpetuating force, and we fall in love with life as our own creation and ourselves as our own creator.

Dr. Linda Gadbois

Consultant for Integrative Mind-Body Medicine, Personal Transformation and Spiritual Mentor

 

 

 

 

 

 

How we Stay Stuck in Patterns, and How to Transform them

One of the most valuable things we can learn psychologically is to really tune into the nature of patterns. All of life operates by way of a dynamic interconnected system of patterns. Patterns are not only formed out of memory as habits or routines, but also out of how we think and reason as creative processes that form our fundamental perception of things, and as the filtering system produced by our mental paradigm which is a dynamic model comprised of correlated, congruent patterns that are constantly being developed and evolved based on our experiences and what we integrate to produce our memories. As we go through life, we’re steadily forming our mental paradigm through our conditioning and what type of dynamics we’re a part of and play a role in, that shape the way we think and perceive, while simultaneously developing and “bringing out” our own style of perceiving through the type of story we begin telling ourselves as a way of making sense of things and making them mean something.

The most basic pattern we form that births and gives rise to all other patterns, is the “life theme” we develop as “our story” about things. This story emerges naturally through our conditioning out of a series of beliefs we form due to our experiences, what we start telling ourselves about them as an interpretation and thought process, and based on what we’re taught and accept as being true and real. All stories emerge naturally out of meaning, which, as children, comes from feelings. As our mind begins developing, and we begin actively creating how we experience things based on how we begin using our mind to reason, we begin constantly asking ourselves in any situation that has significant emotional impact . . . what does this mean?

Meaning, which forms the basis for reality, like the mind and soul producing it, is three-fold in nature, and creates on three levels simultaneously. The meaning we give something that forms the basis of our story as our way experiencing, means something about others, the way the world is in general, and about us in relation to it. All of our “experiences”, which are self-created, don’t come from the actual events of our life, but from how we interpret those events. Interpretation forms perception, and perception “is” reality. Our reality as our experience of the outer world is formed 100% from our perception, which is a by-product or natural expression of our paradigm as our “model of the world”. A model is comprised of an infinite series of memory that are all of a complementary nature and work together faithfully to produce a congruent and consistent version of reality. The structure of our mind as a paradigm is what we can call the core or fundamental pattern that orchestrates and acts as a choreographer for systematically producing all of our perceptions and experiences. It’s what we could think of as our “parental pattern” that produces a series of smaller fractal patterns of the same nature and theme as its offspring. We never have independent or singular patterns, beliefs, or areas of our life, but rather a holistic and unified “system” of patterns, memories, and beliefs. If we try to work with a specific pattern or area of our life that we don’t like and want to change, without ever identifying the “core belief”, conditioned tendency, or habit of perceiving and thinking that’s naturally producing it, we fail to be able to change it, and even when we seem to have changed it in terms of outward appearance, it collapses back into the same pattern and tendency we thought we had changed. This is because it can’t be sustained as independent from the system that’s producing it as a natural and automatic way of thinking and perceiving.

We can however use specific areas of our life and relationships as the means for identifying and becoming aware of our core beliefs and fears, where our feelings counteract our intellect and rational thinking, or where we’re aware that we’re not producing what we want to through various forms of sabotage and deep seated tendencies that are purely emotional in nature and act to magnetically pull us back into habitual patterns. Once we realize that we’re playing out the same fundamental pattern in a variety of ways in every area of our life, we can pick one to work on consciously as a way of influencing and affecting the primary, parental pattern. In doing this, and implementing the proper type of change, one that acts to modify and upgrade the entire system, we not only bring change into that one area of our life, but in the same manner in all areas of our life. It’s only by modifying our mental paradigm as our primary pattern and model, that we ‘break patterns” in selected areas, while replacing them with new patterns that are more beneficial and produce the outcome and type of experience we desire. We’re never “stopping one pattern” or quitting something, but rather changing an old pattern into a new one, or replacing something with something else. This means that it’s not enough to decide what you don’t like or want to change, but also what you “do want instead”, and what new behaviors or idea you’re going to employ in their place. When we decide to change our self and life in some way, we’re moving out of a form of unconscious and natural way of producing habitual experiences and into a role of actively creating with full awareness of what we’re doing and why. This means it requires a strong desire, steady focus, and constant effort (at first). All intentional change only comes through active use of our will and our ability to choose new options and ways of being.

In the most general sense of the word, being always produces doing. All action results from our inward sense of our self. To produce an outward change, we have to work by changing the inward state of being that’s acting through a fundamental form of self-expression to systematically produce it in a habitual fashion. We don’t change the world or other people by trying to work “on them” directly, but by changing ourselves inwardly, which automatically produces how we exist in relationship to the outer world, how we perceive others (in our own image), and how we act naturally to influence them in new ways that change how they respond to us. It’s only by changing ourselves that others and the world in general appears different to us. As long as we remain the same internally, everything remains the same externally. The entire world operates according to the Law of Cause and Effect. All action produces and equal reaction of the same nature and type. To change how someone else is acting, we have to change how we’re acting to stimulate them, and how we sense and perceive ourselves in relationship with them. As long as we’re employing the same attitude, way of looking at something and behaviors, we consistently produce the same thing over and over.

Learning how to Change Your Story

The first thing we have to do when deciding we have to change somehow, is learn how to actively “give up” our story about stuff and form instead a desire to tell a new kind of story that changes how we experience the events of our life and causes us to feel different and “become” a different type of person as a result. Most don’t want to give up their story about things, but instead want to be validated in it, and have everyone and everything else change through a form of agreeing and acting to counteract or go against instead what they’re actually the one creating. Someone who never feels “wanted”, for example, wants to keep telling that story and feeling that way, while having someone demonstrate or prove to them that they “want them”, yet their perceptual filters will always act to interpret any behavior to mean they’re not wanted. Usually of course without realizing that that’s what they’re doing, because we often don’t fully realize that we create our story perfectly through our feelings and perceptions, and only see and “experience” what matches them, and what can be skewed or recomposed in a way that lends itself to telling our story. The “feeling” that at once produces our story, creating an experience that gives us more of that same feeling, being the key component.

Our story is difficult to change because we’ve built our identity out of it as how we perceive and sense ourselves, and as a result don’t know how to tell a different type of story. When we try, we can often feel awkward, unfamiliar and uncertain, in new territory without a means to navigate, and don’t know how to “be” or what to do. All behavior is learned, and with learning comes the unknown. We have to practice something before we get good at it and it starts becoming natural. Change at first feels like we’re not being ourselves, or we’re someone phony or inauthentic (to use a buzz word), and this feeling and thought is what often sabotages our attempts at change and causes us to revert back to old and familiar ways of being that are more comfortable.

We don’t have to work through all of our “issues” and complexes through years of therapy and self-reflection on the events of our life, what happened to us, and why we’re the way we are, which usually only validates and strengthens them, but by learning instead how to use our creative power of choice and free will. We can produce any change we want by making the “clear and actual decision” to change, then disciplining ourselves to consistently produce and act out that decision until it becomes natural and automatic. Ways of feeling, thinking, perceiving, and acting are merely habits we’ve established as the means of producing the experience of ourselves and our life. Like all habits, they can be changed by simply replacing them with new habits. You have to want the change bad enough to do what it takes to produce and then maintain it, by deciding in a fully aware manner who and how you’re going to be and what type of story you’re going to tell by how you live your life.

Changing our story doesn’t mean we form an illusion over what we imagine to be fact, or deny the events of our life that formed our memories, but rather by learning the art of transforming them by interpreting them and telling our story about them from a new and different perspective that changes the experience of them. For example, when I was a kid, one of the stories I kept telling myself was that nobody really knew me for who I am, but rather by judging me to be like my family. I had a fairly traumatic childhood, and was a compulsive runaway, living much of my life on the streets, and was used to those who tried to help me looking at me and saying things like “you poor thing”, which was just about the most god-awful feeling I ever had because it made me out to be weak and pitiful, when my life circumstances actually served to make me very strong and capable. When I became an adult, and moved to a different city where nobody knew my past or family, a voice inside me one day casually said, “ok, now you’re in a situation where nobody knows to judge you based on your family and past . . . so who are you going to be?” And at that moment, the entire course of my life changed, and I was truly in a position of creating myself, which I found exciting.

I started off by vowing to never talk about my past or how I grew up with any new people, living fully in the present and giving them only an impression of what I was like at that time. I did this for years, and it became a natural way of living for me, and I quit thinking about my past altogether in the normal daily sense. I learned how to stay present and to realize in every moment I was deciding who I was going to be by how I acted and what I talked about. Later, when I was in another new environment, I decided to talk about my past as my childhood experiences while only picking the ones I could tell from a humorous and adventurous perspective. I made what was actually drastic and traumatic at the time, seem funny and exciting. I decided to tell stories of running away and hoping freight trains to unknown destinations from a perspective of “Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn”, as an exciting adventure met with constant surprises and quirky opportunities. I learned how to pick different memories to tell stories around rather than the ones I had previously focused on. I became so good at this, that my staff found them very entertaining, and on slow afternoons would ask me to tell them more stories about growing up.

The point to this is that the “way” I told the stories made me feel entirely different and turned me into a different type of person. Because I imagined them vividly from a different perspective, and played them out repeatedly from that perspective, it literally changed my memories by evolving and transforming them. From that point on, every time I thought about those events, I remembered them from a new perspective, and after a while I not only couldn’t remember how I experienced them originally as a little girl, but got to where I no longer felt like that little girl. She became more like somebody I knew really well and loved very much. She was no longer an essential part of me, and wasn’t the one who created the story I was still living out of as an adult. I began realizing that what tends to become our story as our “life theme” that we continue creating out of as adults, originates from a child’s perspective who is simply trying to make sense of things as best they can with the limited resources they have. As an adult I was much more equipped to tell a far more accurate story of my life based on an adult, mature perspective and mindset.

One of the first things you want to notice when forming a new story about yourself and your life, is that you have many memories of your past, but you consistently pick a small handful, usually the ones with the greatest emotional impact, to use consistently to “tell your story” about what happened to you and what your life was like. You could just as easily let go of those and pick a whole new set that you use to tell stories out of (to yourself and others) that would completely change the way you feel and who you become. You can also take the same major events of your life, realize how you interpreted them at the time you were going through them to create how you experienced them, and decide from a perspective of hindsight and what they served to teach you through the realizations you obtained because of them, and (re)perceive them from a new, more mature perspective, and retell your story about them in a way that makes you feel different, and become different by way of them as a result. As you form a new perspective, you imagine it as a reality that created a different type of experience, the type you want as the means of developing yourself in that way. As you create a new experience of it, and you get it just the way you like it, you play it over and over in your mind from within the experience of it. By playing it repeatedly, in vivid sensory terms of being in the experience of it, you establish it as a new memory and pattern that forms the basis for telling a new type of story. Instead of being scared or freaked out, you can be courageous, brave, confident, or surprised and filled with anticipation as a form of excitement. Instead of hurt and feeling betrayed, you can see it clearly, read all the signs of what was going on, and realize that as it happened it had nothing to do with you, and so you remain unaffected by it.

Because we’re the ones that are always creating our experiences of the events of our life, we form our memories also. Our memories become the established patterns as fully interpreted realities that provide us with instant patterns in the present to create more of the same type of experiences through similar events. As we create our experiences that become our memories, we simultaneously create ourselves by way of those experiences. All of our perception and resulting behaviors are produced in a natural and automatic way from memory. Our memories are shaped by the primary patterns of our life as our “theme” or “life’s story” that we’re always acting out and creating in some manner in every area of our life. To change a pattern as a memory, is to either transform an existing memory into a new experience, or create a new memory that you’ll use in place of the old memory that provides a pattern for the subconscious mind to act out naturally and use to produce more realities and experiences of the same nature.

To create a new (virtual) memory, start by selecting a scenario or behavior in your current life that you’d like to change. Form a very clear idea of what you’d like to change it to. How would you like to experience it or behave instead? As you go over the course of events, reflecting on how it went, what your interaction was, how you felt, and what you did, form a clear idea on how you would have liked it to have gone instead, and how you would respond or interact through hindsight. Reform it in your mind accordingly, until it plays out the way you want it to. If changing a behavior and not the overall pattern as a dynamic, leave everything the same (the emotion, meaning, trigger, etc.), and simply “choose” how you would have liked to have behaved, and play that out instead as a new response to the same stimulus. Once you have it the way you want as a general flow, replay it in your mind until it’s consistent. Once it’s consistent as a pattern that can be replayed in the imagination, begin enhancing it with sensory attributes and qualities. Make it vivid, in full color, and up close (immediate). Then shape it further by asking:

  • What are you seeing (picture in detail)
  • What are you hearing?
  • What are you touching or feeling? (objects or textures)
  • Smelling and tasting?
  • How are you feeling? (internally)
  • What are you telling yourself about it (internal dialogue)?
  • Feel it as an emotional experience – as if it’s actually happening.

Play it over several times as an actual experience that’s just the way you want it, until you can recall it automatically. What references a memory in the present is whatever feeling and emotion is connected to it. In order to use it to replace another memory, associate the same feeling and emotions to it. So that anytime you’re in a situation feeling that way, it triggers that memory and you see it as a pattern for creating the same type of experience and reality in the present one.

If you’re creating a brand new type of experience that you want to create, focus heavily on the feeling it gives you, and realize that brand new experiences may not come in the same way you imagine as a specific situation or set of circumstances, but it’ll produce the same type of feeling. You won’t be able to recognize it by what it looks like, but rather by how you feel when in it, having it. The appearance it takes on will be based on what’s available in your immediate, everyday environment that’s of the same nature and will naturally lend itself to co-creating the same type of experience. The reality it comes by way of will however be of the same theme, dynamic, and over-all pattern.

The other thing you have to keep in mind is that you can’t inflict your will on others. If you’re not of the same will, nature, and destiny, the reality you produce that includes them will never manifest. You can’t require specific people to be a part of your memory/reality, and it can’t be an attempt to change someone else, it can only require you to change by directing your own perception and behavior. If other people are involved, they have to be archetypes only, or a representation of a “type of person” who would act naturally to create that type of experience. So “who” actually participates in co-creating the experience, and the set of circumstances it takes place in, might be quite different than you imagined, yet it’ll be the same “type” of experience.

Dr. Linda Gadbois

Integrative Mind-Body Health Consultant and Spiritual Mentor

Temptation – The True Nature of Choice, Will, and Facilitating a Process of Change

The definition of temptation is to induce a person to committing an act by manipulation, seduction, curiosity, strong desire, or out of the fear of loss. Something that coaxes us to engage in short-term urges of enjoyment that threatens long-term goals. We seem to decide between two things, both of which are desirable and compelling in some way, which means we have to give up one of them in order to have or create the other, and a form of internal conflict ensues as a result. We still have a strong desire for what we’re “giving up” while simultaneously knowing that if we engage in it we’ll regret it in the long run, we’ll sabotage ourselves somehow, or we’ll feel disappointed in ourselves.

The feeling of loss we experience when giving up something we find pleasurable or emotionally gratifying in some manner, or that fulfills a need of some kind, in pursuit of something we feel is even more desirable or beneficial, can set into motion a form of internal conflict and constant negotiation that produces an experience of suffering in regards to our choices. It creates a kind of catch twenty-two as a “damned if you do, damned if you don’t” type scenario. This is why “will” is an inherent part of choice as the necessary means for actualizing it and bringing about the desired change by exercising our ability to consciously self-create in a deliberate and purposeful manner.

What we tend to experience is that the minute we decide to give something up that we find pleasurable and have established a habit around, we feel an immediate sense of loss, and experience an intensified and heightened desire for it. We crave it and develop a hankering for it. As we abstain from it, our desire for it seems to become even more pronounced and stronger. Not because it actually is, but because we’re going through change as a withdrawal where we’re very aware of the absence and we miss it and have a longing for it. Because we miss it we have a heightened awareness around it, and think about it in a compulsory manner.

This craving as missing what we’re giving up is the most basic form of temptation that begins a greater process. Once we make it past the initial thrust of exercising sheer willpower and we get a few days into it, we feel we have a handle on it, we become more relaxed in regards to it, and another form of temptation comes into play. This is the coercive, gently seductive part of us that starts talking to us in a way that totally makes sense and makes it okay to relapse, give up our desire to change, and go back to business as usual. This voice plays on our weakness, portraying it in a way that makes it seem like we’re not giving in, just deciding we can do it while still pursuing our other goal in spite of it. We tell ourselves we can somehow manage or control it or not let it affect us. This aspect of us is very persuasive and convinces us to go back to our old ways and forfeit the idea of changing.

This kind of abstinence brings a sense of suffering, internal conflict and emotional anguish, as well as a form of constant emotional negotiation where we begin arguing with ourselves as one aspect outright manipulating and trying to gain power over another aspect. We always have multiple aspects of ourselves that look at everything from different perspectives, with different attitudes, ideas, and motives. In purely psychological terms these are called archetypes or sub-personalities, but we can also think of them as different aspects of our own personality as being of a “multiple” nature and therefore exist in a primary state of constant inner turmoil that’s often arbitrary and capricious.

We are not singular beings with a concentrated focus, but rather composed of a dynamic multifaceted nature that often exists in a primary state of opposing itself. We also have subconscious tendencies, which are emotionally motivated and experientially driven that often directly oppose our rational and objective thinking. The subconscious mind is the part of us that’s ritualistic, habitual, and automated in nature and forms habits around emotionally gratifying activities, then defends the right to preserve those activities. Anytime the subconscious mind is in conflict with the self-conscious, thought-oriented mind of objective reasoning, it nearly always wins out because it uses emotions as the means to seduce, coax, and manipulate the rational mind. Emotions, when left unguarded and allowed to play out without containment, tend to completely run our thought and engage us in compulsive urges and pleasure driven behaviors that have no regard or concern for consequences. This is what we call the lower, animal mind that’s instinctively driven through compulsive sensuous urges and thoughtless behaviors.

When we make a decision to change somehow, our path divides as a kind of fragmentation and sets into motion the need to debate the validity of our choice based on a sense of loss. Whatever we give up, we miss, even if we realize it was bad for us. As we miss it we form an intense longing for it by only thinking about what was good about it, forgetting all the bad. A form of seductive enticement takes place within our own mind. We literally battle with ourselves, first weakening ourselves through thoughts of desire and enhanced sensory imagination that amplifies and concentrates the feelings of pleasure around the activity of it, then struggle with a form of mental anguish at being strong enough to resist it.

This whole process takes place because we haven’t learned how to operate our own mind in terms of realizing how we form an internal representation of ideas that make them either compelling or repulsive. Anytime we’re talking about the “will”, we’re referring to the imagination. It’s through the imagination that we work directly on our own subconscious mind, which doesn’t “think” in terms of verbal thoughts, but rather takes verbal thoughts and turns them into sensory realities in the imagination that invoke a strong emotional component that either make them pleasurable and compelling, or painful and repulsive. Pleasure and pain are the motivating forces of our lower nature as a form of primal drive. Subconsciously we’re always moving towards pleasure and away from pain.

To “will something” is to create the reality of it in the imagination “as if” it’s already happening, creating an experience of it that’s very desirable and has positive emotions associated with it. The language of the subconscious mind is “strong sensory experiences” that elicit an equally strong emotional response. Emotions are the language of the material plane and come as a natural response to our thoughts and experiences. We have to make whatever it is we want to create (our choice) very appealing in sensory terms, while making what we want to quit doing very disgusting and repulsive in sensory terms. Ideas as a sensory reality that mimics an actual experience invokes emotions that not only become the formative motivating factor, but also act to connect us to that same idea all around us. Emotion is the language as a frequency of the material plane and runs in currents that are being transmitted and received all the time. Whatever our emotional state, we’re engaged in the reality of that state and act as a magnet for its fulfillment by organizing and interacting with that same emotion in everyone and everything around us.

One of the primary functions of the imagination is to form “internal representations” of thought as ideas that we use in place of the actual reality of it. When we think about an activity as an experience, we make it either compelling or repulsive based on “how we think about it” it terms of what we associate with it and use to give it meaning. When we associate positive ideas and feeling with it, we create a very pleasurable, joyful, and fulfilling experience of it. Likewise, when we associate negative ideas with it, we make it painful, ugly, and disgusting somehow. This internal representation as an imagined experience of it provides us with a preview that either makes it tempting and hard to resist, or uninteresting and easy to forget. In order to make an idea compelling we have to infuse it with very pleasurable and desirable associations, while making the idea we’re moving away from seem disgusting, repulsive or awful somehow.

If we pay close attention, we’ll further realize that the internal images or scenarios we form in our imagination of the idea has certain sensory attributes and qualities that work at the purely subconscious level to make it seem either distant and dissociated or up-close and intensely real. These sensory features are called sub-modalities and are the method we use to further develop how we represent an idea to ourselves. Anything that we watch and run through our mind’s eye that seems small, off in the distance, and either black and white or monotone in color, lacks intensity and isn’t provocative. It seems far off and unattainable, more like a distant memory that produces very little emotional impact. However when we form images and imagined scenario’s that seem up-close, in vivid color, and intense where we see, hear, feel, smell, touch, and are talking to ourselves about the experience we’re having in very positive terms, they become immediate and act to produce very compelling emotions.

Likewise, whatever we associate an idea with not only shapes the meaning it has but how we “feel about it” when thinking of it. As a general rule the mind is always in the process of forming a chain-of-association that links ideas together as a way of making them mean something and classifying them accordingly. Whatever ideas we associate with an idea shapes that idea in terms of what it means, and them meaning it has shapes how we experience it and what it means about us in relationship with it. We develop ideas to give them meaning by how they exist in relationship with other ideas of a similar nature. When we make positive associations it intensifies the love and desire for the idea, whereas when we associate very negative and disgusting ideas with it, it makes it very repulsive and we form a kind of disdain for it. In whatever way we shape the idea in our mind as an experience that’s associated to other ideas of the same nature, that makes them either desirable or repulsive, shapes our tendency towards or away from them simultaneously.

By learning how to work with our own imagination to form an internal representation of an idea that we use to let go of ideas or break habitual tendencies, or move towards more beneficial ideas with a sense of eagerness and enthusiasm is the secret to using your will to transform habits and behaviors that we’ve outgrown or realize are not in the best interest of our growth and development. When we make a decision to quit one thing and begin doing something new, and we use our “will” to actualize the reality of our choice, doesn’t mean to suffer and struggle through the agony of constant temptation to eventually tire, relapse and give up, but comes rather as our ability to change how we’ve polarized an idea to move it from a desirable to an undesirable state, while transferring the feeling of desire from the old idea onto the new idea. By taking what we once deemed pleasurable and rendering it painful by how we re-present the idea to ourselves internally by “remaking the experience”, makes it easy to resist. As we form our new idea with intense sensory details, positive and compelling emotions, and associate it with ideas whose meaning makes us feel the way we want to feel, we naturally move towards them with a sense of love, devotion, and excitement. It’s all about how an experience makes us feel and what it means about us as we engage in it.

All ideas as realities or potential for creating realities through choice and will, exist in a polarized state as complementary opposites that are extremes of the same idea and form a range or scale between them as degrees of the same thing. All change in the ultimate sense comes as a change in degrees of the same thing, rather than a change in kind. Whenever we “quit” one thing in favor of another, it usually comes as moving from the negative aspect of the idea to what we could think of as the positive aspect. We don’t ever really quit habits, but rather transform them into new habits that are more desirable in terms of their benefits. Whenever we decide to change a behavior, we have to decide what behavior we’re going to replace it with or what we’re going to do instead. If we leave an empty void by deciding to quit something without replacing it, we’ll tend to draw something else in unconsciously and simply begin doing something else that’s not thought out and deliberate. So the minute we decide what we’re no longer going to be, we have to immediately decide what we’re going to be instead, and make a transition from one mindset to another.

Association also has another component in behavioral changes and that comes through the process of “anchoring” an idea as a means of designing a natural “trigger” for it as an activating mechanism. We form a series of associations to an idea that act as the means of activating a whole behavioral pattern as a kind of memory. Throughout our daily life, as we go about our normal activities, we are constantly forming an association in the present with memories of the past as a way of being able to assign “instant meaning” to things as our natural perception of them. Certain behaviors, characteristics, words, tone of voice, touching us somewhere on our body, smells, and so on, act as triggering mechanisms that cause us to reference old memories and bring them forward into the present, associating the present with the past as a form of “this means the same thing as that”, and we subconsciously play out the same pattern as a set of automated behaviors. By realizing this, we can either associate the new behavior to the same thing that served as a trigger for the old behavior, or we can create a new one that we use intentionally to instantly change our state and “activate the pattern” we’re replacing it with. In this way, the old behaviors are no longer capable of being activated in us unconsciously by the same triggers.

Once we realize how to use our imagination to transform old ideas and form new enticing and compelling ones, we realize that we’re no longer “tempted” by the old, and have no trouble whatsoever refraining from it. Just the fact that we’re still tempted by an idea shows us that we either haven’t really made a true decision against it and for something else, and we’re still therefore debating it, or we haven’t used our mind in the appropriate way to change how we perceive, present, and relate to the idea. The decision to quit one thing in favor of another comes through realizations that we form around what we’re doing and the results it produces as natural consequences to our actions. Once we make a decision towards something new that facilitates our growth in a positive manner, and we “willfully bring that choice into fruition”, means to use the natural power of our imagination to re-orientate ourselves in relation to both, what we’re letting pass away, and what we’re creating in its place. Anytime we use our will as our imagination in this manner, change becomes easy and natural and undertaken with a sense of enthusiasm and anticipation, and temptation of the old doesn’t even exist as a part of our experience. We simply forget about the old and move fully into the new filled with a sense of anticipation and awe at our own ability to create our reality and become self-determined as a result.

Dr. Linda Gadbois  

Integrative Mind-Body Health Consultant and Spiritual Mentor  

Save

Personality, Identity, and Ego – Our Main Tools for Transformation

spacious

The personality, identity and ego have a tendency to be used intermittently, and their actual meaning can remain somewhat obscured or vague. This may be due to the fact that they “emerge out of each other” as a natural growth process of becoming. While our personality is related to our bodily consciousness or subconscious mind, and is developed in a completely unconscious (automatic) and spontaneous way in childhood, our identity naturally begins emerging out of or as an extension of our personality when we move into adolescence, and begin building a relationship with the outside world beyond our close knit family unit, and begin thinking for ourselves. As we begin problem solving and reasoning, and as we begin developing our sense of self by what roles we naturally take on and begin playing in group situations, we begin consciously developing our identity through the choices we make, what we’re willing to experiment with, and by how we feel when having certain kinds of experiences. Though in most spiritual scripture, the term “ego” is the same as “identity”, in our modern usage of the idea, the ego has become associated with forming our identity out of an association to purely material things, and is more accurately referred to as the “false ego” or “alter ego”.

 
Our personality gives us our basic characteristics and tendencies as natural behaviors and way of being in the general sense. These develop naturally as children based on the relationship we form with everything around us and how we’re stimulated through a cause and effect, action – reaction type of process. Once this initial stage of development has taken place, it sets the basis for the next stage of development to spontaneously emerge and begin taking shape. As we form relationships with other people, activities, ideas, situations, and so on, more of our inner self is brought out and expressed by how we interact, what we say and do, what roles we begin naturally taking on, what parts we begin playing in a larger whole, and how we sense ourselves through our own experiences. Some ways of being we like, and so we develop them by moving deeper into them, others we don’t like, and so quit doing them while trying something else. Our teenage years are about experimenting with our ability to create ourselves, and as we approach and move into our twenties, our basic identity is in place as far as how and where we see ourselves, what roles and situations we naturally gravitate towards, and what relationships we natural form through resonance. As we create our experiences, we identify with them, and they serve to shape us in terms of our being.

 
This process of identification continues as we move through life, and the ego is naturally formed as an extension of our identity based on how we begin forming our identity around material aspects that we use to form our self image. As we dress a certain way, we feel a certain way, and form it as a part of our personal style. As we drive a certain type of car, we get a sense of ourselves by way of the car as an image we begin forming of ourselves. The house or apartment we live in is related to a certain neighborhood, social and economical status, racial group, etc., and fashions our self-image even further. As we move through life we’re steadily accumulating material possessions and playing certain roles that we continue to identify with and become the basis of “who we are” as an image we form of ourselves, and we become dependent on them. We enter into various relationships that bring out certain qualities in us, and make us consistently feel a certain way, and we sense ourselves by way of these feelings, and they continue to fashion us.

The-Knowledge-of-the-Planets-Cameron-Gray

This aspect of our identity built out of material possessions and our desire to acquire more, or the need to begin exercising control over others through the status we achieve by way of material possessions, forms what is typically referred to as the ego. The ego is a false identity and self-image that produces a false reality that becomes a delusion, because it’s temporary, always subject to changing, and can be taken away or lost, which would cast us head on into a full fledged identity crisis. We wouldn’t know who we are or what to do without them. It would lead us grasping desperately for any form of security we could find. We would be out of our element, in a brand new position and situation with no memory to fall back on, and no longer possess any real form of power and control. When we identify with the material world, we bond ourselves to the material plane, and become “mortal” in nature in the sense that our “self” dies with the body, and our soul seeks life in another body in order to continue living.

 
In most spiritual traditions the term “identity” and “ego” are considered synonymous, and have essentially the same meaning. Our identity is the faculty we use to function and operate in the outside world as the roles we naturally play. It’s only within Christian or religious applications that we find ideas of “killing or destroying” the ego. In spiritual traditions, every part of the whole is a valuable and necessary part, and plays a key role in the overall development of the soul within the body. Every aspect of being plays a specific role in our whole being. You can’t kill or destroy any one part, without simultaneously destroying or disrupting all parts. The idea around the ego as identification with the body and material world is to “transform” it. We can transform it through intentional use of our mind and what we choose to identify with. Whatever we identify with we align ourselves with and draw on as our basic source of power – our inner self or true being – or an outer source by identifying with material possessions that we use to create an image of ourselves in place of who we really are. We use this false image to present ourselves as being important and superior somehow, not through our “actual” character void of material attachments, but by flaunting and over valuing our material wealth.

 
To transform the ego is to change what we associate and identify with. If we choose instead to identify with our Higher Self, the spiritual world or God, then we move into being one with our true identity that always comes from within and is based solely on “who and how” we’re being in any moment. It doesn’t rely on attachments to the material world, and is a source of strength that we possess no matter what our outer circumstances are. We begin operating out of our center of being in terms of our true nature, which remains consistent and is available to us all the time, and can never be taken away from us by another, unless of course, we allow them to. By always drawing on our inner source of invisible powers, we become associated with our spiritual essence, and nourish our immortal self, which transcends the death of the body and remains intact in the invisible realms of the spiritual plane.

The-NeverEnding-Dreamer-Cameron-Gray

The secret of our ego / identity is that whatever we associate with, we become like in nature. By associating and identifying with something, we move into it and merge with it, embody the same qualities, and take them on by expressing out of them, creating our experiences of ourselves, and shaping ourselves by way of them. We alter our vibratory frequency by working directly with our identity. Whatever identity we employ and exist out of, determine how we’re being in every moment and what type of story we act to naturally tell. Our identity is our character which forms all of our behavior, and how we enter into relationship with everything else. When we’re getting our identity from outside means, we’re always in the process of trying to control and manipulate them. We form strong attachments to outcomes and how others need to be in order for us to be okay. We’re literally being controlled by the very thing we seek to control. When we shift that mentality, and draw only on an inner source of being, it doesn’t matter what others do, and we have no need to quest after power, because we already possess it.

 
To identify with our Higher-Self is to focus our attention on “states of being” as qualities of consciousness. We embody and become those qualities and express through them to create in the world by how we enter into a new kind of relationship with it, and act therefore to directly influence it. Instead of saying that when I dress a certain way I feel confident, you become confident as a way of being regardless of how you’re dressed. You ask yourself, what does it mean to be confident, how would I feel if I was confident, and how would I act? What would my posture be? How would I think and talk? You develop the idea of what you’d have to be and do to “appear” confident. You then model those behaviors, practicing being that way, which makes you feel that way. If you continue to intentionally model being confident, by pretending to be, it starts becoming natural and not only acts to completely transform how you think and feel, but how you act naturally to influence other people by how it changes your “cause and effect” relationship as a natural interaction that takes place between you. In this way you cultivate that quality within you and it becomes a natural part of you. As you begin feeling, thinking, and being confident in all areas of your life, it transforms your identity by how you sense yourself and what kind of person you are. Whatever you allow to express through you, you become the same as.

 
When we develop ourselves by cultivating inner qualities we synthesize them into our being, and they remain a part of our eternal self. The quality of consciousness we possess creates the nature of our experiences which become the memory that makes up our soul. Our soul is built up and developed by the memories it acquires through the experiences of the body. At the death of the body and the material possessions we acquired, only what is an essential part of ourselves are carried forward and maintained. Our sense of self based on our body and our position and possessions, dies with the body. By identifying with the material world, we resonate with it, maintain a strong connection to it, and fail to ascend. Because we bond with our material identity, we continue to reincarnate on the lower planes of the Earth, and fail to utilize the power of our material existence to grow ourselves internally by consciously developing our character to a virtuous state and a higher level of vibration. When we identify with the spiritual plane, we form ourselves to be like it in consciousness, resonate and bond with it, and naturally ascend to it after we shed our material existence.

 

Dr. Linda Gadbois

Spiritual Scientist and Mentor for Spiritual Growth

 

Save